


Where are they going?

by AnonEhouse



Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), X-Men (Movieverse)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Fix-It of Sorts, Haven't seen Logan, I haven't seen Endgame, Just the bits I couldn't avoid hearing, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Team Logan, Team Tony, Very small spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-28
Updated: 2019-04-28
Packaged: 2020-02-09 09:28:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18635395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnonEhouse/pseuds/AnonEhouse
Summary: If you've heard ANYTHING about Logan or Endgame, you probably won't be spoilered by this.Written by an author who hasn't forgiven the BBC for the ending of Blake's 7 in 1981 or Disney for Old Yeller in 1957, or the producers of The Green Mile in 1999.So, you kinda get where I'm heading...





	Where are they going?

Logan chewed on his cigar for a moment, then took it out of his mouth. "You want a stogie?"

Tony shook his head. "I quit. Bad for my lungs."

Logan puffed away for a minute in silence.

Tony put out his hand. "Fuck it, I don't have lungs any more. Gimme, Captain Canada."

Logan grunted. He reached up and plucked a cigar out of nowhere.

"Thanks." Tony flicked his hand up and a repulsor beam shot out from his bare palm, lighting it on fire before taking the cigar, biting off the end and starting to smoke. "Oh, that's foul." Tony concentrated and the cigar changed to a Gurkha Black Dragon.

"I need the stink." Logan tapped his nose. "Cuts out some of the smells my nose...oh... fuck it, _I_ don't have a nose any more. Lemme try one of those."

Tony tossed his cigar to Logan, snapped his fingers and produced another one. They sat and smoked in companionable silence for a while. It was peaceful. There were flowers and butterflies, and little singing birds.

"God, this is boring shit," Tony said, reaching up to adjust his halo.

Logan nodded and stretched his wings, scratching idly with his claws to straighten the feathers. "We're supposed to be 'enjoying our well earned rest'," he said with disgust. "Sittin' on our asses. Learn to play a harp." Logan snorted. 

"Sing with the choir," Tony responded. "I have a daughter. Her name is Morgan."

"Huh. I got a kid, too. Laura." Logan puffed on his cigar, and then tossed it away. "Ain't right taking us away when we finally got someone to live for."

Tony looked at Logan. He stood up and stretched his wings, and then began casually walking to the Pearly Gates that stretched up to infinity, impossible to fly over, and walled around with shifting clouds that allowed a view but were just as impenetrable as the Gate. He looked down through the clouds. "Pity the Gate's only one-way."

Logan walked up next to him. "Yeah." He extended his claws. "I got an idea. Juice me up."

Tony grinned, and fired repulsors at Logan's claws. They glowed blue-white.

Logan swiped through the Gate's lock. It swung open. He produced another cigar and lit it while contemplating the Gate. 

"Would you look at that," Tony said. "Poor workmanship. Someone should report it." He flew through the gate, with Logan beside him, their cigars leaving a trail of sweet-scented smoke.

Logan turned and flipped Heaven the bird. "There, reported."

 

Peter sighed, and headed towards the Gates, carrying his tool kit. "There must be an easier way to assign Guardian Angels," he muttered.

**Author's Note:**

> Title refers to the question 'Where are you going' and the response 'To hell if I don't pray'.
> 
> Yes, I know the repulsors only PUSH. They are not heat, any more than Cyclop's eye-beams can set things on fire, but Tony and Logan now can ignore natural laws.
> 
> A single Gurkha Black Dragon costs $1,150.  
> https://financesonline.com/the-most-expensive-cigars-in-the-world-from-cuban-smoke-to-ancient-mayans/


End file.
